Rachel Crick recently spoke with Abby Melville, executive meeting planner at BCD Meetings & Events, on balancing family, work and building your career as a young event planner.
Abby Melville earned an Associate of Arts degree from Cape Fear Community College in 2019 and later attended the University of Louisville, where she completed coursework in psychology. She started working at BCD Meetings & Events in 2022 and currently holds the role of executive meeting planner at the organization. She’s a self-described advocate for working moms and a second-generation event planner. Melville is a member of PCMA’s 20 in Their Twenties, Class of 2026. She resides at Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune in Jacksonville, North Carolina, with her husband, three kids, two dogs and four cats.
Abby Melville
When you describe yourself as an advocate for working moms, what do you mean by that?
It’s incredibly important to me to make sure that, in my daily life, I am doing my part to make sure that other working mothers are leveraging the opportunities given to them and their resources, and that I’m helping if they need help, answering questions and offering information. We are stationed at Camp Lejeune, and a lot of these women aren’t local; they might not have their family or friends. I’m part of several Facebook groups, and I like to reach out and make a post to offer support in terms of resumes, cover letters, applications and general guidance on how to match their experience and passion with the jobs they’re hoping to apply for. I like to make sure they’re aware of how important it is to have a strong LinkedIn presence. It’s important to me to make sure that others within my reach know there is somebody who has knowledge they might not have.
What support systems do you have in your life that make it possible to balance your career and your family life?
I try not to take anything for granted. I have the bonus of having my parents less than an hour from me, as well as some very close friends that we have just made along the way from the military. We trade off childcare and lean on one another. It’s very important to choose your friendships and your relationships wisely and make sure that when people are helping you to shoulder the responsibility of life, you give back as best as you can. We also have an incredible caretaker for our children while my older son is at school. Things come up, and they are not always ideal, and sometimes you just have to take the punch. There have been occasions where my husband has to go away on a military obligation, and the kids are sick, and we don’t have any options for childcare at that time, and I can’t travel. There are emergencies that happen that necessitate mom or dad home, and there has been an occasion where I have had to leave a meeting due to an emergency at home. So, for anybody who thinks that it is a clean-cut, supermom or superdad thing we’re doing perfectly, it is not.
What boundaries do you keep in place to help keep things manageable and fulfilling?
I wish I had a clean answer for you, but I don’t. It’s such a gray area, especially with young kids, the military and the meetings industry. It’s just not black and white; it ebbs and flows. There are some occasions where I have to set a boundary at home to fulfill my work obligations and put forth my time and energy that is owed to my work life, and then vice versa. There are times where I have to set a boundary with work to fulfill my mom life with doctor’s appointments and PTA meetings. I make sure to be the utmost forthcoming with my manager. If I know that something is coming down the pipeline in terms of my home life that is probably going to take some of my time, I will tell my manager. And same thing with home. I tell my family, “I’m still mom, wife, etc., but I have these work commitments.” And most everyone either has children or has familiarity with work-life balance, so they’re generally patient and understanding of it.
What would you say to any busy young professional that feels like they can’t have both careers and families when they’re starting out?
You absolutely can have both. And if that’s what you want, you should have both. You can have everything that you want in life — it may just not all be at the same time, and it might be messy, but that is life. This is another reason I feel so passionate about the concept of relentlessly supporting women who are either already working moms or who want to be. Especially when it comes to having a spouse in the military or a spouse who travels a lot for work. I’ve had a lot of discussions with my husband where I have sat him down and said, “I am not done. We are going to have to figure this out. You have your career, we chose to have children, but at the same time, I’m not done chasing my career. On the contrary, I have a lot to give my career.” And it’s very important to set that boundary. You absolutely can have both; you just are going to fight tooth and nail for it.
What would you say are some of the challenges facing the next generation of meeting and event planners? What about the advantages?
In terms of being “next gen” in the meetings and events industry, it can be challenging because there are some incredible, brilliant minds in the industry who have so much more experience and tenure. When it comes to new people, it’s very easy to underestimate those who haven’t been around as long. I think it is really important to not discredit the minds of that next-gen population because that group of people also has a different vantage point with their thoughts, their approach to things, their ideas and the method to the madness. The younger generation seems to be so hyperfixated and so energetic and hungry for growth opportunities, networking opportunities, learning, knowledge and just expansion. I think that the next-gen population is extremely exceptional at teamwork. We really have a strong tendency to thrive on team culture, supporting one another hand in hand. I think that is one of our greatest strengths in addition to the fierce hunger for growth opportunities and knowledge.
